Lost. Not the Lost that I’m addicted to on ABC. Not the lost that I find myself when I’ve made a wrong turn. Oh, no, this lost is much worse than that. I feel completely lost after the blows that I’ve taken this year. When the year began, I had four beautiful cats that I loved with all my heart.
As you know, I lost Prissy earlier this year. A few weeks ago, I lost both Bo and Svenn. It’s the price we animal lovers have to pay, and after having, loving, and unfortunately losing animals all of my life – I totally get that. But three in the span of 5 months.
There should be a law against it.
Mornings are the worst because for years my morning thoughts have been:
- Get out of bed.
- Turn on the coffee maker.
- Feed my cats! – I’d feed the girls (Prissy and Alexa) first because they are/were inside and, frankly, because Prissy was the biggest eater of all. Then I’d go out and feed my boys. Bo would always be on the back step, looking up and meowing his adorable meow. Svenn would be by his food dish looking back and forth – from me to it and from it to me. Then Bo would jump up onto his shelf where his “cabin” and dish were and Svenn would step over to his area.
Mornings are so much different now and I just can’t quite get used to the feeling. I get up, turn on the coffee, feed Alexa…. then miss my boys like crazy.
Two, at once. I honestly just can’t get past that.
Needless to say, my heart is broken and I’m frightfully sensitive right now. So, you’ll forgive me if I “deactivate” the beautiful pictures to the right for a little while. Each time I see Bo or Svenn’s pictures, it sets off a crying jag. It was that way with Miss Prissy for a long time too. But my girl was so very, very old (and completely blind). She didn’t even enjoy eating as much as she once did. But Bo and Svenn were’nt at all old, blind, or sickly. They were, however, beautiful, colorful, and hilarious, little guys.
And loved. They were loved like crazy. Now they’re missed like two kinds of crazy.
*** I’ve decided to leave the pictures. The crying jags are going to come whether pictures or something else sets them off. Besides, I know that one day I’ll smile when I look at their’s just as I do when I see pictures of other cats that we’ve lost.